Wednesday, August 8, 2012

Jonny Fairplay Famous Quotes

Promises are like fat women on wicker furniture, easily broken by Jonny Fairplay.

  • My grandmother is sitting home watching Jerry Springer right now.
  • This is a game for a million dollars, I've one chance in my life at this. You should take every single advantage possible, if not you're a fool.
  • My grandma is gonna love it.
  • I swear on my grandmother. I swear I swear I swear.
  • Christa made me swear on my grandmother's grave, now it's like one of the last wishes was that I win.
  • She died, dude. (Jonny Fairplay's friend).
  • Sandra isn't final four. And I've got a mill that says she won't be the final one.
  • F**k You!
  • I call it a ghetto christmas. It's like asking for an incredible hulk doll and getting your sister's ken doll painted green.
  • I go by the moniker of Jonny Fairplay. I don't play fair.
  • Probst: "Jon, Let me ask you a question. What is this about (does Jon's hand thing)? Fairplay: That's Jonny Fairplay right there…that's the F that's the Y, I'm all in between Jonny Fairplay. I play fair no no cheatin'!"
  • Hey, Actually, we might eat some funky stuff, so if you wanna kiss before, that's cool (to Darah).
  • Remember the name of oooh Fairplay. (Voting Darah Off)
  • You're doing more not to do work than doing work!
  • Lil: Simple-made things make me very excitable. Jonny Fairplay: I need to date women like you.
  • My Grandma is not here for a reason, She's not around.
  • I'm extremely pissed off at Michelle. Michelle was planning on pretending as of she's the worst of the bunch when in reality she was technically the best but her freaking ego wouldn't let her do it, and that's how I feel about her ego right now (Middle Finger).
  • I feel the last immunity challenge was mind over matter. Obviously sardine is bigger than Sandra's mind.
  • It's about a quarter of a mile to the water. It's not that bad. However that's where every signle mosquito on the planet live. Every one of them.
  • Shawn. Haha. He looks like the moon, except in reverse. (About all the bugs that bit him).
  • Half of her dress is now a skirt for Michelle and the other half is a skirt for black beard.
  • We talk about the treasure, we dream about the treasure, we fantasize about the treasure, I've had more wet dreams about that treasure than any girl in playboy.
  • (About tribal Council) I wanna see it, I can't wait. I think it's gonna be awesome, Knowing that I'm going no where.
  • Game is going great for Jonny Fairplay, I got a one and one alliance with Shawn, and five way alliance with myself, Trish, Rupert, Christa and Sandra. And I have a four way alliance with myself, Shawn, Burton and Michelle.
  • I'm on paradise and I'm a freakin puppet master.
  • Probst: Are you loaded. Fairplay: Yeah! hahahaha. Like you know, this isn't the happiest vacation but you might as well make it the happiest possible.
  • Probst: John, Self proclaimed good strategist, What are you basing your vote on tonight? Fairplay: Uhm, By whatever the astrological signs tell me.
  • I'm willing to stab anybody in the back at any given time as long as it benefits me. I came to the game with that philosophy.
  • Don't trust them, but if they trust me it's cool. But they shouldn't.
  • Once again Jonny Fairply finds himself in a great position. He can either go with plan A, Christa, Rupert, Sandra and Burton. or plan B, Burton, D (Darah), T (Tijuana) and Lil. And I'm throwing all my eggs on plan B.
  • To be the man, you gotta beat the man.
  • I thought tonight's tribal council was probably one of my proudest moments in this game thus far. Big one factor that you can always count on is greed. The greed of the two morgan girls was enough to know that I can trust them to take out Rupert.
  • I'm a great date, I have pretty extensive fine food knowledge, and I was able to show that off.
  • There is a word in the English Language called "naive" and some people are that and obviously those people are playing this game.
  • It seems pretty obvious that the three of them formed some kind of a bond because you know all three share inferiority complexes to that of a man.
  • Whenever you're in the hot seat and someone is ready to vote you off, create tension between two other people and those people will just end up being on the choping block. Case and point tonight it's either D (Darah) or Lil.
  • Lil: How many people have you screwed over Jon. Fairplay: Everyone in the game?
  • Probst: I think Lil just said game on! Fairplay: I think Lil just said game over!
  • (Final tribal council) My question is for Jeff, can I vote none of the above?
  • Can I get a hug? (To Jeff Probst After being voted out of Micronesia).
  • I played a perfect game last time. I consider myself the greatest player in the history of the game.
  • Probst: So Fairplay, are you dressing like me? Fairplay: You wanna know what you're playing for?
  • I just got a message in a bottle saying my grandma (In Micronesia)
  • Jonny Fairplay is sitting back right now being friends with everybody, I'm a very likeable person, very nice person, I just have the ability to lie very easily, which comes in handy here.
  • I think it's insane that there is nine other of your favorite survivors of all time, and they all believe what I say. Have you not watch this show before?
  • You guys are dumber than you look. (To the Fans in Survivor Micronesia)
  • Knock knock, who's there? sea mail! sea mail who?

You have more quotes? Leave us a comment below!

1 comment:

  1. Probst: Johnny in bed with three women. Another first
    FairPlay: Actually not really